We No Speak Americano.

I have so many thoughts rushing through my head all the time. I may actually think about things way too much, but I am unsure if that is possible.

First trimester is almost finished and that is stressful and extremely daunting to me. I often get involved in way too many projects and then let my school work be thrown to the back seat. I have slightly begun to accept the fact that I have a slightly unsatisfactory ethic of getting work done because I do take part in many artistic projects. I am growing as a human being even if I don't meet expectations that people set for me in regard to my school work and other things.

I don't blog enough for you to really understand my whole life. But I put on a cabaret in October with my close friend Alli as the other artistic director and created a student ensemble that performs musical theater music in the community. Well our first performance set went extremely well and led us to wondering what we could accomplish by furthering our work with the ensemble. We are now embarking on our second concert series to go up in mid February. Stay tuned.

I like a lot of things. I like band. I like singing. I like organizing. I like piano. I like the euphonium. I like taking photos. I like writing music. I like thinking. I like talking. I like messing around on guitar. I like acting. I like listening. I like learning. I like cooking. I like creating... I like creating.

I like to create.

"If you want to be an artist, be indifferent to everything but your art." - Pauline Viardot

Time For Change.

So I would consider myself pretty good at what I do. But, I want to be great. And I must admit it is very hard to walk those small steps to be. I guess the main problem is that I am unsure what it takes or what past people who have been great at things have done to get where they are or how they feel inside about it. I am unsure if I have the passion or even capability to be good at certain things.

Currently I am just practicing and trying everything I can to be great at what I pride myself in because I want to make an impact on the world.

I had an amazing extended weekend that was quickly crushed by two mediocre/lame school days.Life gets better though, so it's okay.

"Prejudice is ignorance." - Glee

I Don't Feel Like Dancing Today.

I have a four day weekend to Minnesota Educators Association (MEA) which really benefits my current hectic schedule. This long weekend and tonight seems to be the culmination of many separate projects that are all coming to a point at once. The fact that I have so much going on right now, I am slightly freaking out. I guess the hardest part of all these separate projects is that many of them seem to depend on other people. I can control myself, but when I am depending on many other people it is very hard to get what you want, when you want it.

This four day weekend I will:
-Artistic direct/perform/put on a musical theatre concert with a friend.
-Attend a theatre workshop at a local college in town.
-Finish editing five people’s senior photos and put them all on discs.
-Go see a play at a theatre an hour and a half away.
-Have two photoshoots for two completely different reasons.
-Catch up on all my late and missing homework in school due to that fact that I have been gone/sick so often lately.

And the funny thing is I can’t picture my life any other way. I constantly surround myself with pleasant people and objects because I want to be a pleasant person.

"Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." - Helen Keller

Lux Aurumque

I can do this. No matter what people say, it is possible to achieve what you dream of doing in life. I guess I would rather shoot for the moon and reach the stars, then reach for something attainable and just receiving that. It makes life interesting to want, strive and have a constant drive to fulfill or do something.

So one thing I have found is that I cannot go to any place that has food available for purchase. Because I will automatically, no matter how hungry I am spend all my money I have on me on food I don’t need. Today not only did I have a very fulfilling dinner of spaghetti that me and some friends threw together but I had a mental talk with myself about how I wanted to start eating better and exercising more because I want actual abs. Hahaha good joke, I then proceeded to go to the Acoustic Café with a friend and spend my entire, well almost entire seven dolor bills I had left to my name on a bowl (not even just a cup) of soup and the largest possible size of a blended iced hot chocolate which is basically chocolate milk. $6.58 later I am satisfied and enjoyed my choice in regards to taste but slightly disappointed in my extremely, personable “talking” stomach.

I dislike school greatly and may fail out and sell myself on the street corner. Or become a full time artist… but who knows, my mind changes a lot.

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed." - Albert Einstein

Were The World All Mine

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." - Dalai Lama

Utterly French

Thanks to a blog follower's comment on my last post, I just need to view things in a bit of a different light. Because whatever I do I will be an artist and things must get worse before they get better.

Many things are going on in my very busy life. I currently have nine days to instill some sort of universal idea and view in my ensemble due to slight lack of motivation or want to create something memorable. Every time I pick up my euphonium I am making improvements and am beginning to understand what I need to do to grow as a performer. At the start of this school week I had a total of three tests that I missed and still had to make up, I now have one down two to go. Jazz band auditions are quickly approaching and I uncertain of my standing on the whole ordeal. Personally in my unrealistic dream world, I would audition and be accepted on piano splitting half the music with my classmate Destiny. But for some reason life doesn't work exactly as you would have hoped, like last year and in middle school, when I did not receive the words of acceptance on piano I was hoping for. November first is the due date for all senior photo entries into our school yearbook which is putting me into a crunch for getting many of my friends senior photos take and edited.

All these things happening in my life right now may be a tad bit overwhelming at points, but I know that it will all benefit me wherever life takes me.

To be a dancer, you can read books, look at diagrams, ect.. but the most beneficial thing you could do is dance. To be an artist, I must create no matter what it is or where I am. And I plan on it.

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." - George Bernard

A Date With An Elephant

I am confused about college, about life, and pretty much everything else. You may be like "Alex, confusion is part of life" but it seems like I am just too confused and it is all happening at the same time.

I am am confused and wondering how I can motivate a group of ten students to be able and be ready to perform a concert that I am putting my name on. Even though I am not confused about what field I would like to pursue for my future career, I am very confused as to what I want to major/minor in or what school to go to.

Every night for the last few I have shut off my music and stared at the ceiling. I sit in silence and try to clear my mind of the unnecessary and to figure out the answers to what I want for my future as an artist. Let us just say it hasn't worked yet.

Currently I just want to be less confused.

"A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament" - Oscar Wilde

Love Bug

Time is always moving. Sometimes we absorb or utilize some of it through sleep, meditation, studying or things like that. And other times time moves past us with or without us knowing. Sometimes I wonder… where does time go? When it is not converted into memories or recorded through song, word or some type of media. This last week I am wondering where a majority of my time has went to. ¾ of my last week has nothing to show for it. I received homework, I turned homework, I did sufficient on my homework and by the end of the term when I no longer have to retain any of the knowledge relating to Medieval to Modern World History or Housing and Interior Designs, the knowledge will slowly slip from my head. I want retainable usable knowledge.

Don’t get me wrong I love learning. But I just seem to have a problem with our school system as well. So I was on my thirty five minute lunch “break” at school, standing in line with and endless line of other students in front and behind me. As I am waiting for our very simple school lunch I wonder, how long have I actually been standing in this line of people with same intent as me? You see the only clock semi visible to me is one directly behind me and of course I cannot view this so said clock because there is a line of people blocking my view of the only clock around. Frustrating, right? Well another thing you must know to understand this story is from 9:00 to 3:30 at our HS you are unable to use your cell phone, no matter what the circumstances are. Aware of this rule I bring out my cell phone which is in my front jean pockets, merely to check the time. As soon as I have it fully out of my pocket a “Safety Specialist” jogs towards me, somehow spotting my phone and confiscates it from me. Really!?!?! I was just checking the time and really, this man “Joe” has nothing better to be doing with his time then scanning the lunch lines for people pulling out their cell phones to check the time.

This whole ordeal wasn’t that horrendous because I received my phone at the end of the school day from the office. I guess I just feel that when I am at lunch, the time of the day that I am really not disturbing anyone, I should be able to check my phone for the time.

I want to be apart of something amazing, that treats me like a young adult with personal opinions and views as a human being.


“Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death” – Albert Einstein

Small World

I work hard in the things that I enjoy because they are things I take pride in. I need to learn that some people are just not into it as much as me and that is okay. I will work as hard as I possibly can because it is something I must do to improve, whether it is in singing, playing piano, taking photos, studying, playing the euphonium, studying or analyzing music scores.


"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom." - Aristotle

Hobbies

I am so, so, soooo busy. So busy with things that I enjoy like studying music scores, singing with people, band rehearsals and stuff, that I have no time to actually make detailed posts. But I am trying to at least post a photo that i have taken every day to post at least something for you, my brilliant readers!

But I am delving deep into my like sixth day of school and it already feels like three weeks back. I have already had a fair amount of homework and two quizzes. I survive, at least so far I have survived.


"Only the educated are free." - Epictetus

To Lounge Upon

"Art doesn't work without pain; art also exists for compensating pain." Till Lindemann

Night Life

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us." -Emerson

Flower Picking

"Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution." - Albert Einstein

Far Away From Close

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -Theodor Seuss Geisel

Starting School: Junior Year

Yesterday was my first day of school.. ugghhh. Well here is the gist of it all, day one = pretty lame. Day two = evened itself out and turned out to be an okay day. With the start of a new school year comes the addition of new projects on to my course load including a visual documentation of a friend and my outfits every day at school through photography. So I will post most of my school day outfits on here starting with my first two days, in this post.

Day One.. 9/8/10:

Day Dos.. 9/9/10:

"I'ts all about believing and if we believe in something. then that's real, isn't it?" - Anonymous

Shoelaces, Vacations, SPAM Curds and a Car Full of Purchases

So, if there is one thing that you have not picked up from my past blog posts then you must be oblivious/spell check/grammar handicapped as me. And you may not think so but I feel like I have swell ideas things like that, but when it comes to the correct composition of my sentences I am literally always way in left field. So, in the course of this blog I hope to slightly improve but if you could grant me one wish be open minded to my spelling and grammar mistakes.

I know I said that I was gonna document my four days on vacation and everything but I have found while composing multiple rough drafts of this post, that it is hard to blog about vacation because every single thing you do is different from your every day routine. So in small I could blog every singly minute of my vacation, but I won’t because I care for your sanity. So instead at the end of this post are some photos. I will include some stories, here and there about events though.

I had my chair placement audition for St. Mary’s Concert band on Friday and it went pretty well, surprisingly. I was a little tripped up when I came with two, two octave scales that I believed I had the choice of picking which major and minor scales I perform. Turns out my conductor, Dr. Janet Heukeshoven who is simply excellent, got the final say on the spot. I survived though and I guess that is all that really matters…?

To sum up my vacation with my very close friends the Matthees, I would just have to say that it was relieving and just a change in pace (which was much needed). My days were full of new memories, eating great food, adventuring, taking risks and just enjoying ourselves.

Till next time, my lovelies!

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." - Albert Einstein

A Busy August

So I would start posting about the rest of my vacation but I don't really want to... I think instead I will wait till I am home. Lets together look forward to what my next week has in store for me.

Monday:

Link crew leader orientation all morning/afternoon long :(

- A five hour meeting regarding how to guide incoming freshman.

Back to marching band :(

- My marching baritone is so heavy and I have barley any muscle strength. Literally my arms hurt just thinking about it.

Starting concert band a St. Marys University :)

- I am a little bit nervous to be playing in such a advanced ensemble but I am also greatly looking forward to the experience and to play Four Scottish Dances by Malcolm Arnold.

Tuesday:

Marching band, again :(

Wednesday:

State fair with the marching band :I

-Marching is gonna suck because it is supposed to be just a scorcher temp wise but my third day at the fair with friends shall be fun.

St. Marys concert band :)

Thursday:

Link crew leaders, day two :I

-really a second day too?

Vocal pedagogy class sit in for a friend at Winona State University :)

-Helping out a friend by letting him give me vocal lessons and coach me through the basics of vocal pedagogy.

Auditions for Hear and Now :)

-Same friend has a acapella vocal ensemble that i will be trying out. Sadly, I am still unsure of what I will sing for auditions due to the fact that they don't want any musicals.

Friday:

Cabaret meeting :)

-Working on stuff for a cabaret concert a friend and I are putting on.

Uggghhhhhhh.. busy week, but it all keeps me going. At least I haven't been bored out of mind once this summer. In honor of this great day in american history I propose that I will post soon with some juicy gossip so be on the lookout!

Wednesday.. The Guthrie

I know I said I would not blog till I get back from vacation, but I just could not do it. Only half way into my adventures away from little Winona and I am just bursting with stories! I will start from the beginning and will progressively move from there (ugghh I hate the forms of there, I am like 80% sure that I am using the wrong one too.) P.s. you need to just pull up this page and then open another tab and browse FB and all of that hoopla because I just put up a new playlist and personally I think it is a pretty kick' mix of tunes!

So Wednesday was a great day. Alarm clock zapped me awake at ten thirty so I did get to sleep in.. slightly Waiting for me upstairs was my grandmother's fantastically amazing oatmeal pancakes. Ohh my heart flips just thinking about them... so good! Just trust me. After shoveling pancake after pancake into my belly I gussied myself up and went to Rogans shoe store and got a new pair of shoes since school is starting soon. There was just plain chaos in Rogans when I was drawn to two pair of pumas; a simple black/white pair and then a grey/limegreen/black pair thankfully to the judgment of my lifeline Megan via phone I chose the schaaweett grey pair. They are pretty cool and I love Pumas because they are so durable/comfortable! I will def post a photo sometime soon of me in them.

Blah, blah... I got home, got ready to leave and then set off for the cities. I always really enjoy the drive to the cities. With most of it surrounded by one side Mississippi river and the other bluffs, it is a very serene travel ventures. Obvs I made my grandma endure some of my rockin' musical tuneage, including How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying, RENT (Original Broadway Cast) and Edges.

Went to dinner at this Italian restraunt that was okay. I very much enjoyed the atmosphere over the actual food. But, I did have one of the best fountain produced Mt. Dews in my whole life.

Sorry so many details, when all you want to hear about is the show. Well I literally cannot say much else, besides that the whole experience was just breathtaking. Personally I just love the newish design of the Guthrie theatre including the darker stain on all their glass, abstract architectural designs and the just the plain enormity of it all. We did not purchase that fantastic of seats being placed in the balcony which is located a bit from the stage, but I found that I actually enjoy seats a little farther back because you can take in more and really no seat is a bad seat... just a different experience. I was already a Tennessee Williams fan before I got to see A Streetcar Named Desire but that performance just confirmed that Tennessee understands that through good text a play can conjure up such a physical and emotional grasp over audiences. I was very excited to be graced by a performance from someone who studied at Juilliard college.. the Juilliard college! And Gretchen Egolf who played Blanche DuBois the female lead, did not fail my expectations at all. The whole night was just amazing and made me appreciate what art can conjure up in people. I truly saw fantastic theatre.

I would love to experience the act of receiving a standing ovation by a thousand people, who are all paying $35 - $60 to see you perform.

"I don't want realism, I want magic." Blanche DuBois from A Streetcar Names Desire

And Off We Go!

I am departing for my only vacation of this summer in literally ten minutes. I will be gone for five days. I will def have some good stories, pictures and stuff to share when I get back. I hope you enjoy yoursleves while I am away!

Blogging.. Summer Edition

I cannot believe that tomorow is already going to be August twenty fifth! Where has the summer gone? This last weekend was already my fourth theatre performance in just one summer, and I performed in my citys local parade for marching band! Ufffta!

I have found time moves very, very quickly in my life and in anyone's life when you surround yourself with things that you love and enjoy. And yes, I already do a feel a little stressed and rushed into the fact that school is starting in three weeks. But looking back on my summer I now have three, almost four more theatre performances under my belt, I have grown one year older in the middle of July and have become so much more of an independent person. My life is chronicled by the memories of past shows, random times and nights with friends and other events that make my life what it is.

If nothing else, I am living.

"We learn by practice. Whether it means to learn to dance by practicing dancing or to learn to live by living, the principles are the same." - Martha Graham

Cinderella, HCO 2010

Cinderella

Page Theatre
June 2010

"As lovely as it looks"