I Don't Feel Like Dancing Today.

I have a four day weekend to Minnesota Educators Association (MEA) which really benefits my current hectic schedule. This long weekend and tonight seems to be the culmination of many separate projects that are all coming to a point at once. The fact that I have so much going on right now, I am slightly freaking out. I guess the hardest part of all these separate projects is that many of them seem to depend on other people. I can control myself, but when I am depending on many other people it is very hard to get what you want, when you want it.

This four day weekend I will:
-Artistic direct/perform/put on a musical theatre concert with a friend.
-Attend a theatre workshop at a local college in town.
-Finish editing five people’s senior photos and put them all on discs.
-Go see a play at a theatre an hour and a half away.
-Have two photoshoots for two completely different reasons.
-Catch up on all my late and missing homework in school due to that fact that I have been gone/sick so often lately.

And the funny thing is I can’t picture my life any other way. I constantly surround myself with pleasant people and objects because I want to be a pleasant person.

"Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." - Helen Keller

Lux Aurumque

I can do this. No matter what people say, it is possible to achieve what you dream of doing in life. I guess I would rather shoot for the moon and reach the stars, then reach for something attainable and just receiving that. It makes life interesting to want, strive and have a constant drive to fulfill or do something.

So one thing I have found is that I cannot go to any place that has food available for purchase. Because I will automatically, no matter how hungry I am spend all my money I have on me on food I don’t need. Today not only did I have a very fulfilling dinner of spaghetti that me and some friends threw together but I had a mental talk with myself about how I wanted to start eating better and exercising more because I want actual abs. Hahaha good joke, I then proceeded to go to the Acoustic Café with a friend and spend my entire, well almost entire seven dolor bills I had left to my name on a bowl (not even just a cup) of soup and the largest possible size of a blended iced hot chocolate which is basically chocolate milk. $6.58 later I am satisfied and enjoyed my choice in regards to taste but slightly disappointed in my extremely, personable “talking” stomach.

I dislike school greatly and may fail out and sell myself on the street corner. Or become a full time artist… but who knows, my mind changes a lot.

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed." - Albert Einstein

Were The World All Mine

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." - Dalai Lama

Utterly French

Thanks to a blog follower's comment on my last post, I just need to view things in a bit of a different light. Because whatever I do I will be an artist and things must get worse before they get better.

Many things are going on in my very busy life. I currently have nine days to instill some sort of universal idea and view in my ensemble due to slight lack of motivation or want to create something memorable. Every time I pick up my euphonium I am making improvements and am beginning to understand what I need to do to grow as a performer. At the start of this school week I had a total of three tests that I missed and still had to make up, I now have one down two to go. Jazz band auditions are quickly approaching and I uncertain of my standing on the whole ordeal. Personally in my unrealistic dream world, I would audition and be accepted on piano splitting half the music with my classmate Destiny. But for some reason life doesn't work exactly as you would have hoped, like last year and in middle school, when I did not receive the words of acceptance on piano I was hoping for. November first is the due date for all senior photo entries into our school yearbook which is putting me into a crunch for getting many of my friends senior photos take and edited.

All these things happening in my life right now may be a tad bit overwhelming at points, but I know that it will all benefit me wherever life takes me.

To be a dancer, you can read books, look at diagrams, ect.. but the most beneficial thing you could do is dance. To be an artist, I must create no matter what it is or where I am. And I plan on it.

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." - George Bernard

A Date With An Elephant

I am confused about college, about life, and pretty much everything else. You may be like "Alex, confusion is part of life" but it seems like I am just too confused and it is all happening at the same time.

I am am confused and wondering how I can motivate a group of ten students to be able and be ready to perform a concert that I am putting my name on. Even though I am not confused about what field I would like to pursue for my future career, I am very confused as to what I want to major/minor in or what school to go to.

Every night for the last few I have shut off my music and stared at the ceiling. I sit in silence and try to clear my mind of the unnecessary and to figure out the answers to what I want for my future as an artist. Let us just say it hasn't worked yet.

Currently I just want to be less confused.

"A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament" - Oscar Wilde